Super Hero II

After some complaints about picture quality in the post about Captain Dreadlocks, i decided to add a couple of pix to clear up any questions.

This is a picture of the Captain freshly returned from her last grooming experience.  Note the highly visible facial features.  One can gaze into her eyes.........

And here is the same dog after partaking of the Magic Cloven Beef Hoof which transforms the mild mannered and soulful 'Roid into the indomitable Captain Dreadlocks, devoid of eye contact and unrecognizable beneath the flowing hair..........

AAAAAHHH!!!!

Today is one of the best days in Clovis. Even though we were marooned at Bucksnort's with our cousins Seymour and Esmerelda, the olfactory pleasures we experienced when our parents picked us up were so wonderful. That delectable smell when we bundled into the car--like something roasted but not burned; something spicy and maybe wonderfully hot....And when we entered the house, it was all but overpowering, in a deliciously sensual way-----They had been to the Farmer's Market and gotten our supply of green chiles!!!!!!!!! If you've never smelt the delightful aroma of fresh roasted green chiles, we can only pity you. You haven't even made it up to a dog's life.......

The Pirate Dogs---'Roid, Leny, Weetz, and Bertequila

New Pirate Dog; Old Argument

Let's do the old argument first----There was a piece on BBC World News America this evening in which a gentleman from Oklahoma said the government was going to spend us to death and should just give the money directly to the people.  We've heard this since Paulson and W. started the TARP last year.  So, let's do the math---Let's say the government allocated $1-trillion to just be handed out to each person in the US.  That should really help us all out, right????  Well, $1-trillion divided by the population of the US, which according to the US Census Bureau population clock at about 6:00PM MDT on 5/14 stood at 306,429,317, is $3263.40 per person.  That'll go a long way to ending the downturn, won't it???  And I'm sure it would more than replace the income of those who lose their jobs as companies and local governments go bankrupt or default on payments.   

Now for the news-----We have adopted a new Pirate Dog.  Bertie, aka Roberto Fernando el toro perro, is a rescue from the local oxymoronic kill shelter.  I had wanted a chihuahua since moving here and this is as close as we have gotten, without paying a breeder.  El toro may have a little rat terrier mixed with the chihuahua but he's sooooo tiny he makes Weets look big.

In this picture he's lying in the hall next to a chip stick that's about as long as he is!!

He makes the percentage of male household members 30%.  The Captain has been slow to accept him, and Weets still hasn't. 

But the Captain is pretty mellow all the same as long as this newest crew member follows orders.

 The newcomer has bonded with First Mate Leny.  They even share chip turks and chip stix.  He's still a little too small to spend a lot of time in the Nargle however.

It's only been since Monday that Bertie joined us and he's already hassling Klingon Kats and learning the routines of life as a Pirate Dog!!!

Captain's Chronicles

Far more engaging than Sarah Conner is Emma the 'Roid and I'm sure the canine chronicles will be at least as amusing.

Emma 'Roid came into the house having been purchased from a NH lady who thought she was a breeder.  

The first time a vet looked at her, his comment was that she certainly had those "cock-a-poo knees."  Seems that one of the problems with the breed is a tendency for the rear legs to be weak and the knees all akimbo.  This certainly explains why 'Roid has to get a two-room running start to get up on one of the beds!!

She has dealt with that humiliation as well as the mental agony caused by an insensitive groomer who tried to take a pirate captain and make it too cute:

Yet through all the trials and tribulations, Emma perseveres.  Her accomplishments include supporting piracy around the globe with that fierce crew of Pirate Dogs whom she commands.  Note the looks of absolute intensity she projects from the bridge.

This is a dog who has guided her crew through the transformation from denizens of the canine seas to explorers of the galaxies, directing the transformation of the CPS Nargle into the CSS Nargle.  From her perch on the captain's chair she can survey the unfolding of space before her ship.

Truly, an inspiring figure in the canine pantheon and, despite all her accomplishments, still capable of begging for bone turks and looking as adorable as she can.........

All you Portuguese Water Dogs, eat your hearts out!!!!!!!!!!!!  All you Klingon Kats, be afraid!!!!!

Testing

Today is William Shakespeare's 445th birthday.  Wonder if anything any of us have written lately will stand that test of time????????  "Soft, what light from yonder window breaks....Aaah, it is my lady, it is my love...."---Do I really have to say what play that's from??????  For those of you who must look---last sentence.

But of far greater import to life here-------

The Captain did it---the phasers have been installed on the  Nargle.  And they work!!!!!

The "Kirk of Cock-a-Poos" test-fired them at Andromeclee the Klingon cat, at minimal power of course, and lo and behold---

from

to

Good job, Space-Pirate Dogs!!!!!!!!!

Romeo and Juliet  The prelude to the balcony scene, foo!!!!!!!!!

On a B-day and Other Thoughts

It's the 25th birthday of the discovery of the AIDS virus.  And the front runner for president of South Africa says he is ok because he showered after "allegedly" raping his infected cousin.  Is he really the best person that country could find to run it?  Too bad Nelson Mandela is so feeble---I'd say it was a prime occasion for him to make a come-back.

The modifications to the Nargle continue.  The space-pirate dogs work very hard.   They've been sighting in the phasers.  We're getting a little tired of their campaigning to go to the movie when it opens May 8th though.  Captain 'Roid just can't believe they wouldn't not only allow her into the cineplex but give her all the free popcorn she can eat as well.  After all, she is the "Kirk of Cock-a-Poos"!!!!

How ironic is it that the representative from CA who was ok with all the Bush era privacy violations is now screaming foul after she was recorded in a wiretap and her reputation compromised in a potential scandal with the Israeli supporters in AIPAC who might be spies!!!  I mean, what kind of allies spy on each other??  No I'm not that naive.......But Israel having Mossad agents in the homeland of its arguably only friend??  One should give pause and meditate on this issue.  

Or maybe on all three that this blog post has raised.

Just What I Need!!!!

Followers of this blog know the story of Leny .  Well, today she really did it.  Auntie Bucksnort was pirate-dog-sitting and Leny decided to have not one but four seizures!!!!  The whole bit, stiff legs, drooling, even cut her face near the right eye!!!  So Buck calls me, I rush out of work, and meet them at the vet.  There are things that are important in life, like making a living, raising kids, and then there's the ULTIMATE PANIC---a sick dog!!!!  Let's be real here---pets replace children after the children hit a certain age and are moved out.

So now there's this dog hanging around after an afternoon in the vet's observation crate.  And what do you think the vet gave us for meds (to keep the animal CALM)???  How about Leny will be taking 20mg of Valium twice a day and 1.5 grams of phenobarbital every day!!!!  Like I said---just what I need---a laid back dog that just goes "wow" all evening......totally forgetting the "bow" part of barking!

Of course Capt. 'Roid is pretty sure this was all caused by a continuing imbalance between the phaser generator and the anti-matter nodes on the newly installed matter/anti-matter reactor engines still being fitted to the Nargle as it is transformed from an ordinary canine pirate ship to a space pirate dog starship..........

Pirate Tea

So April 15 is when all the tea parties to protest the massive tax increases happen.  Now, I get paid a couple of times a month, the 15th and last day to be precise.  So I just got my first pay stub post-Obama's plan (went into effect April 1).  My net was an increase of about $26.00, not a king's ransom or TARP money, but certainly not a tax increase---that deducts from the net, right???  So what exactly are these people protesting against??  The tax rates imposed by the LAST administration---as in Republican George W. Bush------and I'm not even going to get onto "teabagging"------------------but whatever floats your boat I guess.

Speaking of boats,  the Pirate Dogs salute the US Navy Seals.  Good shots.  But they are laughing up their sleeves at the rest of this issue.  Those Somali pirates have seized at least four vessels since the weekend and have now delayed Captain Phillips'  homecoming by attacking another US flagged vessel and forcing the destroyer Bainbridge, with Phillips on board, into diverting to protect this other ship.  Just imagine, those were kids that held him---teenagers.  The UN really needs to do something to give options to these Somali kids.  It's worse than an inner city in the US!!

A quick poll question---- given that Bo (left) looks like Capt 'Roid (right),

should Bo Obama be made an honorary Pirate Dog???????  Needs to lose the lei though.

Finally, did any of you see the pictures of John Demjanjuk?  He's the 89 year-old accused of being a Nazi concentration camp guard who allegedly killed some 29,000 people.  I'm not a holocaust denier and maybe this guy is guilty.  But is it right to deport him after all these years he worked here in America?  And there are rabbis talking about justice being done, etc,etc.  Well, to my simple mind, war crimes are war crimes---if John D deserves trial, what about the Israeli leaders who rained rockets and chemicals on the people of Gaza?  What about the Bushies who attempted to justify and did condone acts which on the surface seem to violate the Geneva convention?  All these people should be presumed innocent but all should have their day in court if any one of them has to............Can anyone say "justice?"

Pour Quoi????

An old friend asked me in our last phone conversation "So what's with this Pirate Dog thing? Where's that come from?"

Well, it's what they are, collectively.  Each has a unique story and their biographies have appeared earlier on this blog.  These dogs are each a misfit in their own way.  But as a refresher.....

The Captain was purchased from a Cock-a-poo "breeder (wink-wink)" in NH.  Mostly this person was some unskilled lady who thought breeding dogs a lucrative and easy profession.  So 'Roid came to us with some severe genetic issues.  As she has matured, she's evolved from being a Cock-a-poo with bad knees to a splay-footed chow hound who haunts the kitchen looking for handouts and sits leaning against the base cabinets with one of her rear legs jutting out at a 90-degree angle from her haunches.  She needs at least a 10-foot running start to jump onto the bed, which is a successful operation about 47.6% of the time.

Now the First Mate came to us from a shelter in NH.  Her official biography lists her as a rescue from a kill shelter in Ohio where she was imprisoned as an unclaimed stray.  And she still exhibits symptoms of the low self-esteem that can be produced by such mental trauma as being stranded and unclaimed by one's own family.  Leny meets her dad at the door each evening with a ball or chip-turk firmly between her teeth.  And such a ruckus---singing, whingeing, barking---all kinds of attention getting behaviors as would be expected from a traumatized and neglected child who has found a safe haven but insists on pushing the limits of her new found acceptance.

The Lookout is a NM native.  She was rescued from the local kill shelter.  She was surrendered from a town slightly west of here.  There was no official reason given for the placement of the dog there but we suspect it was "small dog syndrome"---she has a tendency to express herself with growling and threatening body language.  All of us have had occasion to be terrified of Weets when she gets in these moods.  It might also have had to do with her predilection for relieving herself on the dry floors inside when it's raining or wet outside.  Of course, a Schnauzer-Chihuahua mix that channels her maternal grandmother might also give one pause.....

So these three individuals, each with their own style and baggage have found a home together on the High Plains and a place of safety in the crate they've named the CPS Nargle.  A worthy crew joined by their circumstances and belief that being a Pirate Dog has benefits far beyond we poor humans' comprehension

After all, no self-respecting canine would ever name a pet extermination center a kill SHELTER.  To quote Captain 'Roid, "Talk about your basic oxymoron....."

O M G

Mom,

How could you?????????

We poor Pirate Dogs, treated like the lines from the Jim Morrison song When the Music's Over---we feel like the Earth,"our fair sister/ravaged and plundered and ripped her and bit her/..and dragged her down."

Our dear mommy did this to us!!!!!  Sure, we may have needed haircuts but THIS??????  Does this look like Pirate Dogs?????????????

Imagine dressing like this in the Crow's Nest!!!!!

And I sure don't feel like a Pirate Captain!!!!!

But we still love you anyway, Mom. 

 Just don't let that nasty cousin Esmerelda see us like this!!!!!  We know Auntie Bucksnort put you up to the bows!!!

Of Pirates and Spinners

Captain 'Roid is really pissed off. When last seen, the intrepid Captain was begging her mother to make a new flag for the CPS Nargle proclaiming the "End of the United Nations." According to a report on tonight's BBC America newscast, the UN has signed some declaration allowing countries to pursue the pirates onto Somalian land. Now admittedly, Somalia is a failed state and its sovereignty is open to debate. But to allow other countries, including Iran, China, Great Britain, and the US (talk about politics and pirates making strange bedfellows!!!!) to invade in pursuit of the pirates?? Hopefully all those military men will review Blackhawk Down before doing the same foolish thing.....And why does the US, beacon of religious freedom and defender of the right to democratic processes, so fear an Islamic government in Somalia?? Isn't Islam one of the "Great Religions" alongside Christianity, Judaism, Taoism, Buddhism, etc?? Or is all this "Islamic terrorists are radical extremists" just a smoke screen and the US is really at war with Muslims-----shades of Richard the Lion-Heart and the Crusades...........

Do you remember The Spinners from the '70's and that massively "great" song "Rubber Band Man"?? Actually, I detest that song but all the "oldies" stations seem fixated on it.

But those aren't "the spinners" I'm writing about. I'm thinking about the auto-bailout/union busters and whether the Kennedys are more deserving of power as a dynasty than the Clintons, if MSNBC be believed.

GM and Chrysler are doing worse than Packard did in the 1950's. They hemorrhage cash, blowing through billions a month. Their management has been about as in tune to the needs of the average buyer and the concerns about the deleterious effects of automotive emissions on the decaying of the Earth's atmosphere as Bush and Cheney have been to telling the truth about Al-Qaeda in Iraq, let alone the total misinterpretation of the WMD intelligence.
Now, depending whom one reads, we are either headed for, or are already in, the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression. The government has bailed out the financial fat-cats but balks at doing the same for the auto-making fat-cats. The problem is that there are a lot of not-so-fat-cats that would be a lot more hurt by the death of the Big 3. About 1 in 10 American jobs is tied to the auto industry---from parts providers to transportation firms to the workers at the car plants themselves. If we want to see Great Depression type unemployment numbers (like around 25%), then let's allow the Big 3 shut down and add that 10% who lose their jobs to the present 11% without jobs. (I realize the current "official" unemployment rate is about 6% but that does NOT include part-time employees who'd like full-time jobs or those who have stopped trying to find work. That number is over 11%.) That's 21% unemployment. Wouldn't take many, if any, more Citibank job cuts to put us well over that 25% threshold.

But some Senators blame all the failings of the auto industry on the wage disparity between the union workers up north and the non-union laborers in the foreign plants south of the Mason-Dixon line. Taking a real crisis and scapegoating people who will lose their livelihoods to avoid taking action while changing the focus of the argument to something totally non-related is major SPIN!! Even if a UAW member makes $71.00 an hour, that's only $150,000/year!!! And that's nowhere near what an executive at either an auto maker or a financial firm makes!!!! As a matter of fact, it's 1.5% of the 10-million dollar paychecks and bonuses common in executive suites or a Major League Baseball locker room. So let's not blame the union. Deny the bail-out if you don't think management can turn around these companies but let's stop the b.s.

So Caroline Kennedy Schlossberg threw her hat into the ring for the US Senate seat formerly warmed by former first-lady Hilary Clinton (all this assumes she gets confirmed for Secretary of State and resigns). Caroline has a lot going for her. First, her maiden name is Kennedy. She's the only surviving child of JFK and Jackie. She's a major upgrade in looks from Mrs. Clinton and I think she's also better looking than Sarah McPalin (remember her??). So give her the job already. But first we need to watch interminable hours of every Clintonista with an axe to grind and all the MSNBC "analysts" and commentators who need to justify their salaries since the election is over stir up controversy. Who cares if Andrew Cuomo is divorced from one of Caroline's cousins?? What possible effect does it have on her qualifications for the Senate, which are about the same as Hilary's when she was first elected----a member of a family that was in the White House as well as being a lawyer. And Caroline even had a pony at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue!!!!
So enjoy "Rubber Band Man" when you hear it and wish we only had to deal with the musical Spinners instead of the bozo spinners masquerading as learned gentlemen. Hang on to your money and hope January 20 comes faster. But keep your shoes handy just in case...........

Pirates

I noticed some weird things on the computer over the week-end. The Captain seemed very excited and the rest of the crew could barely contain themselves. It wasn't until I caught the news on NPR's All Things Considered this evening, reinforced by the banner running along the bottom of the screen on MSNBC, that I saw the light.
America prides itself on its Armed Forces. But perhaps we now have an incident that is definitive proof that WE ARE STRETCHED TOO THIN!!!!!

Right under the Navy's nose, 450 miles off the coast of Mombasa, Kenya, in the Gulf of Aden, the Somali Pirates have struck again. This time an Arabian tanker with 2million barrels of oil worth about $100million. Apparently the freighter strayed off the recommended and well patrolled shipping lanes. "Gotta hand it to those Somalis", said Capt. 'Roid. "They got gigantic brass cajones!!!!!!!" The captain of the Pirate Dogs also wished their compatriots a fair wind and hoped they might dip their beak in any profit the venture realized.

Happy Halloween

Today I saw a sign on a church advertising a "Festival of Lights" for the evening of October 31. I'm sure my conception of this is very different from theirs. My ideal would be all these kids dressed in costumes carrying flashlights or lit up pumpkins throughout the neighborhood where all the windows have illuminated Jack-o-Lanterns or glow-in-the-dark black cats or witches...... cackle cackle.... boil and bubble, toil and trouble..... wingardium leviosa. Please can I have some extra candy????

But this is a special time of year for the denizens of the CPS Nargle. Obviously they can't have chocolate and too much sugar is worse for their teeth than for the average kid. But they get excited none the less.

Captain 'Roid has been plotting in the Nargle about vengeance on the cats. Her musings are interrupted whenever anyone goes into the kitchen, however. The Captain is the original chow hound. You can see from her face she just was giving orders ending in "ARRRRGH". Just look at that scowl!!!! Lord help whichever cat she has decided to take action against.

Now First Mate Leny has just returned from her patrol of the perimeter of the yard. Her primary duty is to bark and hassle any travelers in the alley behind the house. She also keeps a wary eye out for any stray cats who happen by. Her favorite prey is Skippy-Kee who loves to tease and run. But have you ever seen a cuter pirate dog?

Lookout Weetzie keeps both eyes peeled for trouble, especially in the form of joggers or walkers in front of the house. Her assignment is to nag the First Mate until the latter goes to the window and acts ferociously enough to deter any passers-by. Even though Weet's right eye doesn't look all that clear in the picture, she doesn't miss a trick---or treat.

After all, isn't that what this holiday is all about?????????? So be generous, especially if these three come to your door:

Happy Halloween from the Pirate Dogs. Remember, they love you and a little treat goes a long way----Trust me, you don't want their "TRICKS."